Not Just Another Day at the Beach

From critique partners or editors, we are told that we should show, not tell. As we know, one of the best ways to do this is by employing the five senses. Easier said than done. Many writers fall into the trap of leaning only into their sense of sight. Guilty as charged.

It’s hard work to use multiple senses skillfully. Number one, it requires us to be fully immersed and in touch with each of our senses. It takes time to do this, which we all agree we don’t have enough of! The other day my critique partners suggested I include more of the senses in one of my scenes for the reader to fully experience what the character was feeling. I struggled to carefully choose just the right words to describe what something smelled like and how it felt. It was taking a lot longer than expected, so that’s when I decided it was time for a break. What better way to take a break than to play with my grandson at the beach. I know this may sound as if I were procrastinating, and maybe I was, just a little.

“Come on, Grandma, let’s go,” he said, taking my hand and dragging me toward the shoreline. I inhaled salt air mixed with wafts of the scent of suntan lotion. An ocean breeze gently kissed my face, blowing strands of hair that had escaped my cap across my face. Off in the distance, where the blue sky met the crease of the ocean, two dark gray curved fins spun like wheels over the sea and beneath the surface, followed by another fin and another. When the dolphins were completely out of sight, my grandson and I returned to our pails parked in the sand, ready to build the best sandcastle ever.

We scooped up piles of soft granules, letting them trickle through our fingers into the pails before patting them and turning them upside down to form turrets for the castle. Circling the turrets, we carved out a moat, then sprinted to the water’s edge. Cool waves lapped at our feet while water swooshed into our buckets. We dug deep into the wet sand in search of sand crabs that tickled our palms before scurrying away.

We trudged back to the castle balancing our buckets as shells crunched beneath our feet. The grit of wet sand mixed with dry sandpapered our toes. After filling the moat with water, we drizzled water atop the turrets to create pointed spires.

Building a sandcastle is not for the fainthearted, so naturally we’d worked up quite an appetite. Beneath the shade of our beach umbrella, we dove into the most delicious cheese sandwiches slathered with creamy mayo and crispy lettuce, topped with a sweet tomato. I thought to myself, “How is it that even a cheese sandwich tastes better on the beach?” 

The following day, I sat at my computer, armed with an arsenal of my five senses, ready to revise my scene so it would come alive for my readers. And all it took was a day spent at the beach with my grandson (untethered from all devices and unencumbered by things) to reactivate all the wonderful senses I have been blessed with!

Shellie

Where the rhythm of the road meets the rhythm of the page


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